Learn From One Of My Biggest Mentoring Mistakes

I knew I needed support when I first got into the coaching business. Most of the programs I thought I could benefit from was too expensive for someone like me. I got into coaching to help others but I also needed it to change my lifestyle. I wanted to so from struggling to living. Having a coaching business was a path to get me there. It just seemed like I was going to dig myself closer in debt trying to get the help I so desperately needed. 

I discovered this group that seemed like the hope I needed. They were willing to mentor me in exchange for helping them out. Some of my responsibilities were meeting clients, running errands and marketing their events. It wasn’t something I was incapable of doing. Plus, they were going to help me grow my coaching practice. It was everything I wanted. 

So I thought.


I feel like that they used my skills. My talents, my intellectual labor, and my name just for their benefit and not for mine at all.

Click below to listen to me tell the story of my biggest mentoring mistake.

Learn From One Of My Biggest Mentoring Mistakes

by Contessa Louise Cooper

I realized that my time was consumed with assisting with the growth of their business and not enough on my own coaching business. I would receive general or no responses at all when I would pull back a little and ask for a little focus on the things that I needed professionally. I really wanted this program to work so I ignored the reg flags and kept pushing forward, 

One day, I tried to log into the system to see what I need to do today and none of my passwords worked. It wasn’t until I received a message from one of my peers that I realized I didn’t forget my password. All of the mentees were locked out of the system without warning. 

They used my skills.

They used my intellectual labor.

They used my network.


Then abandoned me.

I was hurt and it took years for me to learn how to be in community and what true mentorship can really look like. You don’t have to sell yourself to the highest (or lowest) bidder to receive the help you need. You don’t need to be subjected to mentors who only want to consume you. You don’t have to be in a mentoring relationship where your needs, wants and desires don’t matter. 

We are building something different with the NeuroVerse Collective. Things can be better in the coaching community and we are willing to do our part.


Do you have a mentoring or a coaching nightmare story? Comment below if you are willing to share.

1 Comment

  1. Loreal

    Been there. Done it. People took the barter system and made it disgusting. I’m sorry this happened and I thank you for sharing your story!!


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Contessa Louise Cooper

Contessa Louise Cooper

Contessa Louise Cooper is everyone’s favorite no-nonsense creator and maker known for taking no sh*t. She uses her natural humor and training to help professionals become more joyful and productive by empowering them to embrace their diversities as assets and not limitations. In her spare time, she unlocks the secrets of the universe with her cat Fahfo and considers herself a tech nerd.